Club goin' up, on a Tuesday (Club's goin' up but Dimmesdale's dragging me down)

I've made the random decision to blog tonight. 

I mean, there's, you know, college, and homework, and a gallon of ice cream with my name on it somewhere in the freezer...but I feel like I need to get this off my chest (sometimes you have to make catharsis a priority). 

Class was rough for me today.

 I LOATHE Arthur Dimmesdale.

We've had some "difficult to love characters" so far in AP Lit. But wow, this guy just takes the cake (for me at least, I know Sara Swords is somewhere out there ready to jump to the defense of her bae).

 And although I had a great debate team (shout out to Phoebe, Sarah, Courtney, Olivia, and Caroline), I won't lie: my heart wasn't in it. Let's be real, nowadays if some guy got his girlfriend pregnant and then up and left her to raise the child on her own so he could resume his career as an aspiring youth minister, society would not extol him and we would all call him out on it. 

Admittedly, I do have a little sympathy for the man. 

He did suffer some and was stalked by Chillingworth (a fate I literally wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, Chillingworth was creepy af)

Also just randomly, my brother saw me blogging about TSL and insisted I put in this Asian-Dad meme:

(Sam's a bit of a wacko, but he's family, and plus this is also something I could totally see my dad saying)

Why do I hate Dimmesdale so much? That's taken me longer to figure out. Initially I thought it was because I hated his "woe is me, let me tell you about my secret pain", and I do hate him for that. Plus, even if he was inflicting pain upon himself, it was not alright for him to leave Hester on her own. He is not a stand up guy. 

But in all seriousness (and it's time to be vulnerable now), I think it might be because I see a bit of myself when I read about him. I am not an adulterous reverend in Puritan-Hell, Massachusetts. I don't climb scaffolding at night to yell to my fellow villagers. I don't give fantastic religious sermons. But, there was a time in my life where maybe he and I weren't so different. I have a tendency to trust manipulative people, and that's gotten me into serious trouble in the past. Overwhelmingly cliché, I know, but unfortunately true.

Real talk: Sometimes you think you know someone, and then they change, and that hurts. Sometimes you lose best friends, sometimes you lose loves. We've talked about it a lot this year. There's been "The Art of Losing". Newland has left Ellen. Daisy has died. Brett and Jake have grown apart. Dimmesdale? I would say he lost Hester, but then again, he and Hester were never really together were they? He was always hiding. 

I'm putting a poem below. From my second favorite poet, Charles Bukowski:

"in this cage some songs are born"

I write poetry, worry, smile,

laugh

sleep 

continue for a while

just like most of us

just like all of us;

sometimes I want to hug all

Mankind on earth

and say,

god damn all this that they’ve brought down

upon us,

we are brave and good

even though we are selfish

and kill each other and

kill ourselves,

we are the people

born to kill and die and weep in dark rooms

and love in dark rooms,

and wait, and

wait and wait and wait.

we are the people.

we are nothing

more.

Dimmesdale...maybe he was a bit of a coward. But we all have moments of cowardice. We've all screwed up, but I believe, despite everything, it is enough to be human, even amidst all of our chaos.

Also, a little side thought, just found this side quote from Nathan H. :

(Was this really the same Nathan who wrote The Scarlet Letter? Wow…what a man. And happiness is a butterfly? Pretty bold metaphor, Nate. I like to think he was having an existential crisis while writing the Scarlet letter and then when he popped out this quote he was eating waffles or something…)

Anne 

Hoping that it's okay to use the word "pimp" twice within a matter of 3 sentences

Just want to pay special tribute to Mistress Hibbins and her #pimpin outfit in Chapter 22

"It was Mistress Hibbins, who, arrayed in great magnificence, with a triple ruff, a broidered stomacher, a gown of rich velvet, and a gold-headed cane, had come forth to see the procession"

The triple ruffs, the gold pimp canes, the witch headdresses, asking to escort Dimmesdale to the woods...

Werk.

The Magical, Mystical Forest

                         

                                  (ooooh creepy)

When Dimmesdale and Hester Prynne ventured into the woods, I imagined a foggy forest with branches masking their conversation. But course in The Scarlet Letter, the forest isn’t just an ordinary forest No, I think the forest has the power to change people and distort perceptions.

            Before Reverend Dimmesdale crossed into the metaphorical alternate universe, he was upset. He was emaciated. He had no hope. But in the forest, something happened. Hester courageously spoke of her undying love for him, and surprisingly he also yearned to run away with her. His eyes twinkled again, and the sun peaked. When Dimmesdale emerged from the forest, he was a new man. He felt liberated and alive again. He exclaims:

“I am not the man for whom you take me! I left him yonder in the forest, withdrawn into a secret dell, by a mossy tree-trunk, and near a melancholy brook! Go seek your minister, and see if his emaciated figure, his think check, his white, heavy, pain-wrinkled brow, be not flung down there, like a cast-off garment!” (195)

He felt as if old Dimmesdale was shed off physically. But with his happiness came a great cost. He suddenly had malicious intentions for others. He scoffs off a new church member and wants to be cruel towards the kids – a total 360.

            Hester Prynne entered the woods as a confident, strong woman. But as time elapsed in the eldritch woods, she became less sure of herself. Immediately after she threw her Scarlet A away and let her hair cascade over her freely in a dramatic fashion, Pearl appeared. Pearl acted as if she did not recognize her own mother without the embroidery on her chest. Pearl had a fitful scene until Hester pinned the letter back onto her clothing and tied her hair back. Hester is characterized as dreary now. As she left the woods, Hester Prynne was no longer spirited and a conformist to society – a total 360.

How would the magical forest flip your personality??

love,

Courtney

Dimmesdale: Not Quite the Character I Thought

Okay unless these woods harness some crazy magical power to totally change a person, Dimmesdale is just not the man I had previously presumed him to be.  Maybe we hadn't received the deep workings of Dimmesdale's mind from the narrator, maybe the woods really did change him into a totally new man, but what I am thinking is that we had Dimmesdale all wrong.  Here's the thing: a person doesn't go from a holy, tortured man to some id controlled man merely by taking a walk into a forest (even if it is magical).  So what exactly is happening here?  Did Dimmesdale always have this strange id inside of him?  Was he just confining it as our old friend Dr.  Jeykll?  Did the woods bring out Dimmesdale's Hyde?  It seems as if the thought of running away with Hester is completely changing this very tactful and self-controlled man.  He is becoming reckless and care free.  During these chapters Dimmesdale is much more of a man than a minister.  Think about his moment with the elderly sorrowing woman.  He doesn't even remember what he said to her, what kind of minister is he?  This kind old woman is in deep sorrow over her loss and he has no care.  I guess he is caught up in his mind and dreams of crossing the ocean with Hester by his side.  The odd thing was that the old woman was still incredibly touched and affected by his completely meaningless words.  Is he still able to comfort others with his enlightening, sanctified words without even trying or are the people simply comforted by the thought of him?  And the scene with the young, pretty girl!  Wow.  Personally I did not see this one coming. I just find it strange that he is so enticed by this youthful girl, when he was just talking to Hester about their future together.  I mean maybe the girl meant nothing to him, maybe it was all just in the moment, but still the fact that he was so enthralled by her I feel is strange.  Some serious id is going on right there.  Personally I am seeing a glimpse of the man who tarnished Hester.  What is the difference between Hester and this young girl?  They were both unsullied, alluring girls (prior to Dimmesdale getting a hold of Hester).  Is this a pattern for Dimmesdale?  Maybe Dimmesdale has more of the Black Man traits than we have so far been presented with by the narrator.  After thinking more of this Black Man , I am thinking that the Black Man is not a person.  I think that the Black Man is inside of everyone-it is the id.  It is the wild.  The uncontrollable.  The evil when unrestrained.  The enemy of the Puritans.

All I know is that his Election sermon is going to be quite interesting.  Dimmesdale is clearly writing with some intense fervor and new-found inspiration.  I am wondering whether he will accidentally reveal one of his many secrets that seem as they will bubble over at any second.  Honestly even if he does reveal his tarnished traits, the people might be too hypnotized by his "angelic" voice and presence that they don't even notice.

Sorry Sara I just totally trashed your man Dimmesdale :(
Don't take it personally...I just don't think we have been shown what has truly been going on within this "holy" man's mind.

Scarlet Letter Rambles

I'm a very visual person, and whenever I read a book, I have very vivid images in my mind of what the characters are doing and what the settings look like. So here's a little peek into what was going on in my mind during chapters 18-20 (featuring gifs, because gifs make everything better).
When Hester lets her hair down:  

When Pearl wanders off into the forest:              
"The truth seems to be, however, that the mother-forest, and these wild things which it nourished, all recognized a kindred wilderness in the human child"










Pearl's little temper tantrum after she realizes the scarlet letter is gone: 













Good ole Dimmesdale walking back into town after his..."transformation":

So there you have it folks. My mind is somehow able to plausibly connect the Scarlet Letter to Disney movies...okay. 
But in all seriousness, there was a big shift in these chapters. Our lovers, who hadn't spoken to one another for 7 years, are now going to run off to Europe together. Dimmesdale is so different from his own self that he might as well have multiple personality disorder. Hester has a glorious moment of freedom, ripping her hair out of its bun and throwing that scarlet letter away (although sadly it made it's way back to her bosom {read: boss-um}) 
And then there's Pearl. So I think it's safe to say that I generally have an unpopular opinion. First, I said that Isabella shouldn't be so quick to save her brother and was quickly shot down by everyone (except Anne...thanks Anne). THEN, I said I'd rather live in Puritan New England than corrupt Vienna, which apparently was not a sound opinion to have. To come back to my point, I think I might be more like a Puritan than one should care to admit. If I lived in the city, I would think Pearl was a devil child too. Oh look, Jack Jack does that too:

She is so obsessed with that darn scarlet letter, she won't come near Dimmesdale, has some strange connection with the forest, and seems have the intuition and brain capacity of a 30-year-old man. I don't know but she is a fishy character. 


Looking forward, I am interested to see what's going to go down between Dimmesdale and Chillingworth, because there is just no way Hester and Dimmesdale are going to make it out of town without Chillingworth first making a scene. We shall see. 

Little Sparrow

Stop Blaming Hester

Poor Hester. For the past 7 years she has had lacked any substantial support. More than that, Hester is attached to so many secrets which she must keep (for the benefit of others) and are surely tearing her apart.

1.      Dimmesdale is Pearl’s father

2.      Chillingworth was her husband

3.      She won’t reveal to Pearl the true meaning of the “A”

Chillingworth and Dimmesdale appear to be hiding behind a façade, and basically Hester must deal with the real, emotional sides of the boys since she is still the only one in the circle of trust.

In Chapter 14, we see a conversation or argument between Chillingworth and Hester. I would just like to reiterate how creepy Chillingworth is, especially in Hester’s description:

“You tread behind his every footstep. You are beside him, sleeping and walking. You search his thoughts. You burrow and rankle in his heart! Your clutch is on his life, and you cause him to die daily a living death; and still he knows you not.”

(Chillingworth ^^)

First, how ironic is it that Chillingworth is a physician and he is ultimately “causing [Dimmesdale] to die a living death.” Other than that, this paragraph makes Chillingworth sound obsessed with Dimmesdale. 

In addition, Chillingworth says, “And what am I now?...I have already told thee what I am! A fiend! Who made me so?” Hester takes the blame for Chillingworth’s creepy new personality, just as she takes the blame for everything else.

For example, Dimmesdale often leaves Hester to clean up the mess, even if he was part of the destruction. Hester is the one with the ignominy. She must raise a child all on her own. She even has to console Dimmesdale. At the end of Chapter 17, Dimmesdale says, “I must die here! There is not the strength or courage left me to venture into the wide, strange, difficult world, alone!” As if Dimmesdale is the one alone—he should try being Hester for a day.

And finally, a found poem

To Chillingworth:

I pity thee, Roger Chillingworth

With your ghastly emptiness

And no good mercy

You are a dismal maze

And good that has been wasted.

Thou hast been deeply wronged,

Yet there will never be peace

or faith, long forgotten, from you.

Forgive.

But you won’t.

We all suffer,

Still thy first step awry you planted the germ of evil

It was a dark necessity.

You are fiend-like. 

Pearl the Pearl

As Chillingworth makes another eerie appearance in chapter fourteen, Hester's confidence and poise is her weapon against him. I am a little creeped out by him as the narrator says, "This unhappy person had effected such a transformation by devoting himself, for seven years, to the constant analysis of a heart full of torture, and deriving his enjoyment thence, and adding fuel to those fiery tortures which he analyzed and gloated over" (148).
This is Chillingworth:

His devil-like self appears seven years later after leaving Hester and then attempts to psychoanalyze Dimmsdale, reveal the secrets hiding in the town, and attempt to gain some power and have a voice. He attempts to convince Hester that the magistrates will let her rid of her "A", but she refuses. Her refusal was a defensive act, yet when she must explain to Pearl what her "A" stands for, she stutters. I think this picture below accurately depicts Pearl's inquiring of the letter "A" on her mom's clothing.


Hester used to find strength in this gold-embroidered "A", which gave her her most precious possession, Pearl. But regardless of her stance on her "A" and its meaning to her, she has certainly instilled important values within Pearl. Pearl's intuitiveness throughout these chapters simply mirrors that of her mom, Hester. She does not fear speaking up or expressing herself. Her imagination is quite large as seen when she creates an imaginary friend/mermaid; her imagination is likely induced by her seclusion from other kids and society, but does not seem to phase her. She reminds me of John Steinbeck's novel The Pearl in which the main man risks his whole life for a small pearl. Hester might be forced to wear an "A", but ultimately she cares about the wellbeing of her daughter, but something must go awry to follow the plot of Steinbeck's novel.


Pearl's character exemplifies the effects society can have on individuals and the impact of one's surroundings on her development. All Pearl knows is having a maternal figure who proudly sports a Scarlet "A". This can be similar to our lives and roles in society. We often perceive situations based on our surroundings, which then makes me question how much of our thoughts and opinions are authentic if they are influenced by society? Where is the line between authenticity and societal expectations drawn? I believe that we have the ability to follow our own path and not that of society, similar to Pearl who does not resemble a typical Puritan girl.